29 June 2005

Do you have a secret?

Do you want to share it? Maybe with someone you don’t know, and who can never know you. Bold enough even for that? Will that help you? Will it make you cry? Will it make you feel better? Maybe this is what you are looking for: Secrets.

Frank Warren runs the site. He invites people to send him their secrets on a post card. I am touched by the site. Excruciatingly beautiful. I went through the site with voyeur-like hunger, wanting to know people’s erotic, guilty, or plain dirty secrets. It made me think if I had a secret of my own to share. I don’t think there is, or I have forgotten (!). Remembered the times when I knelt down to pray, to talk to someone who was not from this world, and how the tears came one by one at first, and then in gushes. Sometimes there were reasons for feeling low. Sometimes, it was just existence.

But when I talked about it, somehow I overcame it. Talking about what pained me seemed to make me bigger than the problem and helped me look beyond it. Not everyone wants to talk, though, nor can every secret/pain be shared. And anyways, no one seems to be interested. Secrets can be a blessing then. This site is for those who cant fathom this world, who feel constrained to kill themselves for want of a loving person who will listen, too.

Thanks Spliff, for linking to this rare site.

22 June 2005

Me tagged

Swaroop has tagged me. So here goes:

Total number of books I own: Have lost count. But surely more than 100 spread over three cities.

The last book bought: 'The Kandy-Colored Tangerine-Flake Streamline Baby' by Tom Wolfe.

The last book I read: Soul Mountain by Gao Xingjian

Books I am currently reading: Pather Dabi by Saratchandra Chattopadhyay; Oxford Guide to Plain English by Martin Cutts.

Books that mean a lot to me: Disgrace by J M Coetzee, Mookajjiya Kanasugalu by Shivram Karanth, No Logo by Naomi Klein, Jungle by Upton Sinclair.

And I am tagging Uber, Finny, Mishi, Shyam, and Sudu. Dya hear me?

21 June 2005

Borrowed thoughts

A friend's thoughts:

How do women conditioned to a "ruthlessly male chauvinist" society accept and go by male chauvinist values? Women in such societies adhere to, and judge the worth of men by, male chauvinist and vainglorious ideas of 'machismo'--- even though they rightly dismiss such ideas as silly.
I wonder if masochism, supposedly inherent in women, encouraged male chauvinism and sadism. Did (masochistic) mothers knowingly or unknowingly sow the seed of male chauvinism into their male babies, so that they would grow up and create an environment in which women's masochistic urges would find fulfilment?

Before the coming of the Aryans, Greek islands were inhabited by non-Aryan matriarchal/matrilineal tribes. That matriarchy was deeply ingrained among them is evidenced by the clashes portrayed in Greek drama between the Erinys and Apollo; in Greek mythology, between Zeus and Hera, his non-Aryan consort, etc.
Could such an established matriarchal set-up give way before the patriarchal Aryan invaders without some catalyst such as the innate masochism among its women helping the process?Matriarchy has been wiped out from the civilized world (even though matriliny ligers in pockets).
I wonder if this wasn't because a matriarchal set-up never did satisfy the woman's innate masochism. And so, may be the woman helped to create an anti-woman ethos---so that she might derive a masochistic satisfaction from railing at the lack of consideration, the cruelty, and the injustice of the patriarchal society she quietly helped to create!
This is a new view to me. But I had always pondered how the present societal order came to be. I am still thinking about of this.
What do you say?

09 June 2005

Powerless against PowerPoint

More than anything else in this world, right now I miss my computer the most. And yes, I cant believe that it’s me who said this just now. The thoughts just wont come out on paper as they do on a comp. There’s something magical that happens when you see your words on screen. Oh yes, you can see it on paper, too. But, (aaaaaaaaaargh), didn’t work for me.

Lately, I have been subjected to a downpour of PowerPoint presentations, any my brain has declared total hartal. It simply refuses to acknowledge any information that is presented through PowerPoint. It automatically switches off when the presentation begins. Why, why in the name of God was PowerPoint invented, when a simple whiteboard and marker would do? Why, oh why?!!

Please, all those who have anything to say about PowerPoint, please say it. It might just soothe your soul. Who knows, we might just form a PowerPoint-battered club. Of course, management geeks can and will defend it. Lazy bums, and unimaginative brains!!

For the last month, I have been living in Bombay, and it has been pretty decent. Moolah doesn’t really matter. You can have fun anyways. Because, if nothing else, you can look at the sea, see the sun off into the bay, stretch your comp-strained eyes over the horizon, and suddenly you are not thinking any more. Sunsets do that to me. They have an amazing way of dissolving your thoughts.

I can watch the sea day after day and never be tired. Without the sea, Bombay is any other city. And the local trains, of course!

'Public pissing', 'women pissing', 'Debonair', 'why women cheat', are the hot search terms that are bringing people to my blog. ROTFL